Monday, June 10, 2013

Day 1, Fail. Day 2, ROUGH.

I was so super psyched to start my raw challenge.  Saturday night my family and I went to one of our favorite restaurants - Golden Corral.  Hubby likes the meat.  My four year old likes the chocolate fountain.  My baby likes the fruit (hey, at least I got one kid on my side!).  I binged.  I ate anything that looked good to me.  I filled my plate THREE times with food that won't be crossing my lips for 30 days.  And then I came home and felt awful.  I felt so heavy and gross and lethargic and just overall gross.  It made me even that much more excited to wake up Sunday morning to a raw lifestyle.

Sunday morning I woke up energized.  Ready for a fight.  I even stepped on the scale to give myself more fuel for the raw fire.  I fixed the kids and I breakfast (fruit salad for me!) and off we went to church.  By the time we got home I was HUNGRY.  I'm not talking the typical lunch hungry.  It was a I-Hope-People-Don't-Hear-My-Stomach-Growling hungry.  I made myself a huge salad - greens, carrots, peppers, tomatoes, avocados, sesame seeds, and a vinaigrette dressing.  It was tasty but although my mouth was exhausted after eating the last bite, I didn't feel full.  So I had a banana.  And then a peach.  Then the kids and I went to the grocery store to stock up on more fruits/veggies to fill my bottomless pit of a stomach.  Came home and had more fruit.  Some guacamole with carrot chips.  Another banana.  By this point I was feeling like that little caterpillar from that Eric Carle Book and I was STILL hungry.  Dinner was some peanut butter (I know, not really raw) mixed with some oats and some unsweetened coconut flakes.  By this point not only was I hungry, but I had a killer headache from not having any caffeine for 24 hours and I felt weak.  I took one look at my four year old's chicken tortilla and caved.  I shoved the whole thing in my mouth and savored it.  And then I ate the one I made for hubby that he hadn't eaten yet.  And then I ate two ice cream bars.  Day one = total fail.

Now, normally at this point I would tell myself that this is pointless.  That I'd rather eat whatever I want and be fat/happy/sick/whatever.  That if I can't get through day 1, I'll never make it.  But you know what?  I didn't this time.  I got up today and started over again.  I want this.  I want to win, dammit.  My spirit IS stronger than my body.  I CAN do this.  I WILL do this. 

And I did it.  Today, I was 100% raw.  I had a rockin awesome smoothie for breakfast that kept me full almost until lunch.  I had a huge salad for lunch.  Guac/carrot chips for a snack.  And I tried a new raw recipe to make a "real" meal for dinner.  It was DELICIOUS.  You soak walnuts for a couple hours and put them in a food processor (I used my Magic Bullet) with some Mexican spices and use it like taco meat.  The original recipe was for a taco salad, but I put mine in lettuce wraps with bell peppers, carrots, more guacamole, and topped it with some homemade cashew sour cream.  It was something I'd eat even if I wasn't doing this raw challenge.  Hubby even got home from work and asked why there was ground beef in the fridge - it even looks that much like it!  (Find the original recipe here: http://www.thesweetlifeonline.com/2013/01/11/raw-taco-salad/

I am still a little hungry and as I type this I have a massive I-Think-My-Head-Might-Explode headache.  Caffeine is an evil little "harmless" drug.  I've gone through caffeine withdrawal before, and it is rough but I just keep telling myself it only lasts a few days and then I'll be better for it.  I will survive this.  I can do this today.  I'll be honest, 30 days seems incredibly daunting and impossible right now.  But today I did it.  And if I did it today, I can do it tomorrow. 

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